I got published!
I wrote this bit of satire that became my first guest post.
Big day.
I wrote something funny that was picked by a satire publication I’ve been following here on Substack.
Read ”Caitlin Clark Opts to be Paid in Memorabilia” (by yours truly) on Thalia’s God-Tier News
Other posts I’ve liked include:
Hope you enjoy it!
I’m also preparing a separate satire piece to submit to McSweeney’s. Fingers crossed!
Three recent stories:
The Tailgater
Last weekend, I was driving to church with my family.
It was about 9:30am. Traffic was light. The mood was good.
As I exited the freeway, I noticed that a sedan was right up on my back bumper.
My normal move is to slow down to aggravate a tailgater. To punish them for their insolence.
But today, I turned the other cheek. What a saint I am.
I moved to the side to let them through.
“After all,” I thought, “what if they’re racing to the hospital to see a loved one?”
The car zoomed to my left, and we drove side-by-side on the city street.
Then he whipped right in front of me, jammed on his breaks to make a hard-bank-right-turn into the Jack In the Box drive-through.
The Tattoo
I saw a woman recently with a short bob haircut that revealed a tattoo on the back of her neck.
It read, in simple, small, black lettering, YOLO.
I guess if you’re the type of person who gets a tattoo that you will never see, this is an appropriate life philosophy.
Well-Rounded
I wonder if Shark Tank has tricked us into thinking that everyone should want to be a businessman (or businesswoman).
When my company was acquired in 2015, I thought I needed to play the role of “serious businessman.” Look the part. Dress the part. Show up to “important” meetings to talk about dashboards, margins, and projections.
Prior to that season, I might have thought of myself as creative talent. And while I COULD do the numbers, I felt an imperative (self-imposed? eager to please others? trying to justify the price they paid for my company?) to conform to the image of “business executive.” That my true self had perceived lower value.
Some might call this being “well-rounded,” but if you look at the phrase “well-rounded,” it means you’ve shaved away the pointy bits.
And I wonder if people—especially men, and especially in business settings—too often feel the pressure to conceal the very thing that got them into the room in the first place. The weirdness. The parts that don’t match. The unique stuff.
When I say that I’m “on a journey from smart back to art,” that’s what I’m saying.
To rediscover the parts of me that are, well, me.
Who’s feeling the same?
Thanks for following along!
Be well,
Alec
Niiiice
“…from smart back to art.” Really love this. If I might be so obnoxious… I read this with quotation marks, like this: …from “smart” back to art. The genius is in your artistry, to be sure.